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SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 34

SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 34Mr Anantharaman Subbaraman from Tamil Nadu was waiting for clearence in US airport for over an hour.. 
He went to the counter and asked "why are you not calling my name"?
Officer- "We have been announcing & calling you for so long. Where were you"??
In the meantime announcement came "final call for Mr. 'Anotherman Superman' please board the plane"!

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👌👌  who is poor?

A wealthy woman goes to a saree store and tells the boy at the counter "Bhaiya show some cheap sarees. It is my son's marriage and I have to give to my maid."
 
After sometime, the maid comes to the saree shop and tells the boy at the counter "Bhaiya show some expensive sarees. I want to gift my Mistress on her son's marriage"
 
Poverty is in the mind or in the purse?

=============================================

Do you use Gas for cooking?
Please read this and take note. Let this not happen to you.. This could be a common mistake in any household.
This shocking accident
happend.  A housewife died due to burns sustained in the
kitchen. Her husband too was
hospitalized for injuries due to burns while trying to
rescue his wife.

How it happened:
The gas stove was on and cooking in progress. 
The lady observed some cockroaches near
the sink and grabbed a
can of insect killer and sprayed it near the gas stove, which was on. 
There was an explosion and in no time the poor woman was covered in flames, sustaining 65% burns.

 Her husband rushed in, tried to put out the flames and his clothes too caught fire. 
The husband is still in hospital, in the burns ward, 
still unaware that his wife was declared dead on
arrival. 

Let us understand: - All insect killer sprays such as
"Hit", "Mortein" etc. have highly volatile and inflammable solvents.

The atomized nano spray particles spread very rapidly and one spark is enough to ignite this explosive mixture with oxygen present in air. 

Please educate your family & Friends about this and spread the word around.... 

Don't Keep this msg. in your inbox. 
Please share...
who knows you may save more than a life... 


I just did my part.!

=======================================================
What we can call Hindu GOD names in IT world.

Brahma: “System installer”

Vishnu: “System operator”

Shiva: “System programmer”

Narada: “Data Transmitter”

Yama: “Deleter”

Apsara & Rambha: “Virus”

Ganapati: “Anti virus”

Hanuman: “E-Mail”

Chitragupta: “Hard Disc”

Saraswati: “Google"

Parvati: “Mother Board”

Lakshmi: “ATM”

=================================
BALANCE SHEET Of LIFE: 🔺 What comes to you is Credit. 🔺 What goes from you is Debit. 🔺 Birth is your Opening Stock. 🔺Death is your Closing Stock. 🔺Your ideas are your Assets. 🔺Your views are your Liabilities. 🔺 Your happiness is your Profit. 🔺Your sorrow is your Loss. 🔺Your soul is your Goodwill. 🔺 Your heart is your fiixed Assests. 🔺 Your duties are your outstanding Expennses. 🔺Your friendship is your hidden Adjustment. 🔺 Your character is your Capital. 🔺 Your knowledge is your Investment. 🔺Your patience is your Bank Balance. 🔺Your thinking is your Current Account. 🔺Your behaviour is your Journal Entry. 🔺 Bad things you should always Depreciate. Have a nice balance sheet 👍
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Worth reading....
good story. 

Once there was a farmer who discovered that he had lost his watch in the farm. It was not an ordinary watch because it had sentimental value for him.

After searching the hay for a long while,
he gave up and call the help of a group of children playing outside the barn.
He promised them that, the person who found it, would be rewarded.

Hearing this, the children hurried inside the barn, went through and around the hay but still could not find the watch. Just when the farmer was about to give up looking for his watch, a little boy went up to him and asked to be given another chance.
The farmer looked at him and thought, “Why not.? After all, this kid looks sincere enough.”

So the farmer sent the little boy back in the barn. After a while the little boy came out with the watch in his hand.
The farmer was happy and surprised and so he asked the boy, how he succeeded where the rest had failed. 

The boy replied, 
“I did nothing but sit on the ground and listen. In the silence, I heard the ticking of the watch and just looked for it in that direction.”

MESSAGE : A Peaceful mind can think better than a Worked up mind.
Allow a few minutes of Silence to your mind every day, andy see, how sharply it helps u to set your life the way you expect it to be.

MORAL : The soul always knows what to do to heal itself...
The challenge is to silence the mind.
====================================================


Girls go and spend Rs 300 on a sandal and come home and tell the whole house I went shopping.. 

Guys go out and spend Rs 1,000 on 🍻🍺and come home and sleep quietly.. 

This is what Simplicity is all about..

Shanmuga Murugan Subramanya kannada devotional mp3 - sung by Dr.Rajkumar


In this post , we share some of the old sample mp3 kannada devotional collections on Lord Shanmuga / Murugan / Subramanya sung by our legendary actor and singer PadmaVibhushan Dr.Rajkumar . These are just sample songs posted to promote kannada devotional music, If you like the songs please contribute by buying much more classics at Kannada music stores.

Click on the links to listen or download the song

Subramanya - navilaneri

Subramanya - shanmuka

Subramanya - shrungara


Avimukteshwara temple , Hoskote , Bangalore weekend destinations

In our expedition towards Bangalore East , we recently visited Hoskote , a taluk in Bangalore rural district which is about 35 kms from city center very near to Bangalore Tirupati national highway . We explored few heritage temples at this spot dating back to many years. In this post we cover one such spot - The Avimukteshwara temple.

Avimukteshwara temple - front view
It is known to be one of the very large Dravidian structure temple. It houses shiv linga , parvathi idols, a spacious navaranga, showing Vijayanagara features.

Avimukteshwara temple - Gopuram

Avimukteshwara temple - Pillars
In front of the temple is a Dipasthambha, about 7 to 8 metres tall with a circular pedestal which is in Maratha style.
Avimukteshwara temple - Stambha

Maintained by Government of Karnataka , the locality people say this temple is open for darshan and pooja only between morning 6 AM to 8 AM and open till noon on special occasions. Temple attracts village community during every Mondays, Shiva rathri and Karaga festivals.



If you happen to pass by Hoskote , this is a must visit heritage spot to get a glimpse of art work of our ancestors. Do visit this spot and share your experiences.

Panduranga Vittaleshwara Temple , Hoskote - Bangalore Weekend destinations

In our expedition towards Bangalore East , we recently visited Hoskote , a taluk in Bangalore rural district which is about 35 kms from city center very near to Bangalore Tirupati national highway . We explored few heritage temples at this spot dating back to Cholas and Vijayanagar Kings period. In this post we cover one such spot - The Panduranga Vittaleshwara temple.

Panduranga Vittaleshwara Temple View



Few highlights of this temple


  • Situated in the center of the taluk on old fort road 
  • Believed to be around 300 years old
  • Believed to be established and developed by Marathas during Chattrapathi Shivaji period
  • As per priest here , temple established during 1631 AD , there was no progress in temple construction for about 50 years . Renovated again during 1681 AD


  • Chattrapathi Shivaji Image inside temple
    Lord Vishnu idol is a must watch very attractive which is of about 1 meter height in the form of Panduranga accompanied by Rukmini and SatyaBhama. Also idols of panchamukhi Ganesha and Hanuman are consecrated here. 


    Temple is open everyday for pooja and darshan between morning 6 AM to 9 AM and in evening between 5 PM to 7 PM. Do visit this spot and share your experience. 

    Kote Anjaneya Temple , Hoskote , Bengaluru weekend destinations

    In our expedition towards Bangalore East , we recently visited Hoskote , a taluk in Bangalore rural district which is about 35 kms from city center very near to Bangalore Tirupati national highway . We explored few heritage temples at this spot dating back to Cholas and Vijayanagar Kings period. In this post we cover one such spot - The Kote Anjaneya temple.

    Kote Anjaneya temple - Hoskote




    Few highlights of this temple

    • Known as "Khila AnjaneyaSwamy". Khila in hindi means Fort.
    • This temple is situated in the center of the taluk on the old fort road. 
    • Believed to be at-least 800 years old. 
    • Small temple of about 1500 sqft , but attracts with the beauty of sculptures dating back to cholas and vijayanagar kings
    • Just opposite to Avimukteshwara temple
    • Lord Hanuman is worshiped here . Idol height is about 1.5 mts
    This place was influenced by Marata Kings especially Chatrapathi Shivaji who had taken renovation activities of many temples here.



    Maintained by Government of Karnataka , the locality people say this temple is open for darshan & pooja only between morning 6 AM to 8 AM and open till noon on special occasions. Temple attracts village community during Hanuman jayanthi and Karaga festivals.

    If you happen to pass by Hoskote , this is a must visit heritage spot to get a glimpse of art work of our ancestors. Do visit this spot and share your experiences.

    SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 33


    Once upon a time ..a small boy named SURESH lived in a tiny village. All his classmates hated him for his stupidity especially his teacher who was always yelling at him "you are driving me crazy SURESH"...
    SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 33


    One day his mother went to check out how he is doing at school and the teacher told her honestly that her son is simply a disaster, getting very low marks and never had she seen such a dumb boy in her whole career...

    The mother could not accept such a feedback and she took her son out from that school. she even shifted to another city ...

    25 years later, that teacher got a cardio disorder and all the doctors have advised her to go for an open heart operation which only one surgeon could perform then..

    Left with no other choice she did it and the surgery was successful ...when she opened her eyes, she saw a handsome doctor smiling to her, being under anesthesia effect, she wanted to thank him but could not talk, in turn, he was staring at her face which started turning blue, she was raising her hand trying to tell him some thing but in vain and eventually died...

    The doctor was shocked and was trying to understand what just happened, till he turned back and saw our friend SURESH working as a cleaner in that hospital who unplugged the ventilator to connect his vacuum cleaner......      
                    
    If you were thinking that SURESH became a doctor, its because you have been watching too many Indian movies, serials or have been reading too many motivational foward messages...
    SURESH is SURESH. 

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    The last stages of the war in Ramayana.


    Blood flowing like a river. The vanquished Ravana lying on the ground, groanin g in pain, awaiting his death. 


    Rama calls Lakshmana .
    Lakshmana, the ever obedient brother says “Yes brother, what do I have to do”

    Dear Lakshmana, I have a very important job for you. For all his faults, Ravana is still a great man, very learned, full of wisdom. A great Siva Bhakta. A benevolent Chakravarty. Singer, musician, expert in Veena, knows al the Vedas by heart. Please go to him, pay your respects and request him to share his learning before he departs from this world. 


    The ever obedient Lakshmana immediately proceeds to the place where Ravana is lying. He stood near his head. Hearing the footsteps and recognising that Lakshmana is standing near his head, Ravana keeps quiet. 


    Lakshmana waits a long time and returns frustrated. 


    Reports to Rama what happened. Rama, the all knowing, smiles.



    Lakshmana, when you go to someone for learning, you have to stand at their feet, not sit on their head. Learn to pay proper respect to Ravana so that he can impart his learnings. 



    Lakshmana goes back and stands near Ravana’s feet. Looking at Lakshmana, Ravana smiles and welcomes him. 


    Dear brother Lakshmana, welcome. How can I be of service to you asks Ravana. 


    Lakshmana keeps silent. Ravana understands the purpose for which Lakshmana has come. He requests Lakshmana to come near him so that he can whisper in his ears.👂


    Says Ravana, I will teach you the 3 most important things which all must follow in their lives :
    ----
    ----- 
    -----
    1. Please Don’t get hooked to Whatsapp and waste your precious time.


    2. Don’t use Facebook and endanger your privacy


    3. While driving, please don’t use your Mobile.
    You will succeed in your life.

    ========================================


    The on-duty nurse took the anxious young Army Major to the bedside. 

    "Your son is here," she said softly, to the old man lying there on the bed.

    She had to repeat the words several times before the patient's eyes opened. 

    Heavily sedated because of the pain of his heart attack, he dimly saw the young uniformed Major standing outside the oxygen tent. 

    He reached out his hand. 

    The Major wrapped his toughened fingers around the old man's limp ones, squeezing a message of love and encouragement.

    The nurse, observing the touching moments, brought a chair so that the Major could sit beside the bed.

    "Thank you Ma'am !" a polite acknowledgement followed. 

    All through the night, the young Major sat there in the poorly lit ward, holding the old man's hand and offering him words of love and strength. Occasionally, the nurse suggested that the officer move away and rest awhile. 

    He graciously refused.

    Whenever the nurse came into the ward, he was oblivious of her and of the night noises of the hospital - the clanking of the oxygen tank, the laughter of the night staff members exchanging greetings, the cries and moans of the other patients.  

    Now and then she heard him say a few gentle words. The dying man said nothing, only held tightly to his son all through the night.

    Along towards dawn, the old man died. The Major released the now lifeless hand he had been holding and went to tell the nurse.

    While she did what she had to do, he waited...

    Finally, she returned &  started to offer words of sympathy, but the Major interrupted her
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .

    "Who was that man ?" he asked. 

    The nurse was startled, "He was your father," she answered. 

    "No, he wasn't," the Major replied. "I never saw him before in my life."

    "Then why didn't you say something when I took you to him ?"

    " I knew right away there had been a mistake, but I also knew he needed his son, and his son just wasn't here "

    The nurse listened on, confused. 

    " When I realized that he was too sick to tell whether or not I was his son, knowing how much he needed me, I stayed."  

    "So then what was the purpose of your visit here, at the hospital, Sir?",  the nurse queried of him.

    "I came here tonight to find Mr. Vikram Salaria. His son was Killed in J&K last night, and I was sent to inform him."

    'But the man whose hand you kept holding whole night was Mr. Vikram Salaria !"

    They stood in complete silence. There couldn't be anything more assuring for a dying man than his son's hand.

    The next time someone needs you ... just be there & Just stay !!!


    WE ARE NOT HUMAN BEINGS GOING THROUGH A 
    TEMPORARY SPIRITUAL EXPERIENCE,
    WE ARE SPIRITUAL BEINGS GOING THROUGH A TEMPORARY HUMAN EXPERIENCE.......


    SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 32

    SMS Jokes , funny text shares , Humour , Witty quotes , Greetings - Part 32The 26 letters of the English alphabet are so intelligently arranged...they show you the way of life....  "A"lways "B"e "C"ool. "D"on't have "E"go with "F"riends n Family. "G"iveup "H"urting "I"ndividuals."J"ust "K"eep "L"oving "M"an kind. "N"ever "O"mit "P"rayers. "Q"uietly "R"emember God. "S"peak "T"ruth. "U"se "V"alid "W"ords. "X"press "Y"our "Z"eal...

    ======================

    MAKE A LIVING 

    OR

    MAKE A LIFE OUT OF LIVING 

    In 1923, nine of the wealthiest people in the world met at Chicago's Edge Water Beach Hotel .

    Their combined wealth, it is estimated, exceeded the wealth of the government of the United States at that time. These men certainly knew how to make a living and accumulate wealth. Attending the meeting were the following men: 

    1. The president of the largest steel company, 

    2. The president of the largest utility company, 

    3. The president of the largest gas company, 

    4. The president of the New York Stock Exchange, 

    5. The president of the Bank of International Settlements, 

    6. The greatest wheat speculator, 

    7. The greatest bear on Wall Street, 

    8. The head of the World's greatest monopoly & 

    9. A member of President Harding's cabinet. 

    That's a pretty impressive line-up of people by anyone's yardstick. 

    Yet, 25 years later, where were those nine industrial giants? 

    Let’s examine what happened to them 25 years later. 
    1. The President of the then largest steel company (Bethlehem Steel Corp), Charles M Schwab, lived on borrowed capital for five years before he died bankrupt. 

    2. The President of the then largest gas company, Howard Hubson, went insane. 

    3. One of the greatest commodity traders (Wheat Speculator), Arthur Cutten, died insolvent.

    4. The then President of the New York Stock Exchange, Richard Whitney, was sent to jail. 

    5. The member of the US President’s Cabinet (the member of President Harding's cabinet), Albert Fall, was pardoned from jail just to be able to go home and die in peace. 

    6. The greatest “bear” on Wall Street, Jesse Livermore committed suicide. 

    7. The President of the then world’s greatest monopoly, Ivar Krueger, committed suicide. 

    8. The President of the Bank of International Settlement, Leon Fraser, committed Suicide. 

    9. The president of the largest utility company, Samuel Insull, died penniless. 

    What they forgot was how to "make" life while they got busy making money! 

    Money in itself is not evil; it provides food for the hungry, medicine for the sick, clothes for the needy. Money is only a medium of exchange. 

    We need two kinds of education: 

    a) One that teaches us how to make a living 

    and 

    b) One that teaches us how to live.
    ..........

    There are many of us who are so engrossed in our professional material life that we neglect our family, health, social and most important spiritual responsibilities. 

    If asked why we do this, we would reply that "We are doing it for our family". 

    Yet, our kids are sleeping when we leave home. They are sleeping when we come back home!! Twenty years later, we’ll turn back, and they’ll all be gone, to pursue their own dreams and their own lives. 

    Without water, a ship cannot move. The ship needs water, but if the water gets into the ship, the ship will face existential problems. What was once a means of living for the ship will now become a means of destruction. 

    Similarly we live in a time where earning is a necessity but let not the earning enter our hearts, for what was once a means of living will surely become a means of destruction for us as well.

    So take a moment and ask yourself………. 
    Has the water entered my ship?

    I hope Not!

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    Long message... Worth reading..
    When Swami Vivekanand was studying law at the University College, London, a white professor, whose last name was Peters, disliked him intensely.

    One day, Mr. Peters was having lunch at the dining room when vivekananda came along with his tray and sat next to the professor.

    The professor said, "Mr Vivekanand , you do not understand. A pig and a bird do not sit together to eat."

    Vivekanandji looked at him as a parent would a rude child and calmly replied, "You do not worry professor. I'll fly away," and he went and sat at another table.

    Mr. Peters,  reddened with rage, decided to take revenge.

    The next day in Class he posed the following question: "Mr.Vivekanand , if you were walking down the street and found a package, and within was a bag of wisdom and another bag with money, which one would you take ?"

    Without hesitating, Vivekanandji responded, "The one with the money, of course."

    Mr. Peters , smiling sarcastically said, "I, in your place, would have taken the wisdom."

    Swami Vivekanand shrugged and responded, "Each one takes what he doesn't have."

    Mr. Peters, by this time was fit to be tied. So great was his anger that he wrote on Swami Vivekanand's exam sheet the word "idiot" and gave it to Swami Vivekanand.

    Vivekanandji took the exam sheet and sat down at his desk trying very hard to remain calm while he contemplated his next move.

    A  few  minutes later, Swami Vivekanand got up, went to the professor and told him in a dignified polite tone, "Mr. Peters, you signed the sheet, but you did not give me the grade."

    Don't mess with intelligent people..

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    3 people were waiting at the gates of heaven

    GOD-
    Only one can enter...

    1st-
    I was a priest. I have worshipped you all my life.

    2nd-
    I was a doctor. I have served you all my life.

    3rd-
    I was a teacher. Apart feom teaching I had to perform the following duties,

    Attendance record,

    Defaulter lists,

    Official work,

    Administrative work,

    Social work,

    Aptitude tests,

    Group discussions,

    Entrepreneurship cell,

    Revaluation,

    Practical oral exams,

    Newsletters,

    R & D cell,

    NSS activities,

    Robotics,

    Intra college events,

    Seminars,

    Presentations,

    Workshops,

    Faculty Development prog,

    Exam duty,

    Election duty,

    Admission Round duty,

    Assignments,

    Term work,

    Invigilation,

    Paper Checking,

    Paper setting,

    Counselling,

    Remedial classes,

    Industrial visits,

    Planners,

    Discipline,

    Website,

    Hospitality,

    Exhibitions,

    Student Clubs,

    Pamphlet design,

    Banner design,

    Guest lectures,

    Annual sports,

    Traditional day,

    Annual gathering,

    And

    2 to 5 hrs per week stay after working hrs,
    And..........



    GOD-
    Please stop!
    Don't make me cry
    You have already gone through hell,

    Welcome to heaven!



    All those who says teaching is an easy job...

    Salute to all teachers...

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    Man O Man!
    When without money,
    eats vegetables at home;
    When has money,
    eats the same vegetables in a fine restaurant.
    .
    When without money, rides bicycle;
    When has money rides the same ‘exercise machine’.
    .
    When without money walks to earn food
    When has money, walks to burn fat;

    Man O Man! Never fails to deceive thyself!
    .
    When without money,
    wishes to get married;
    When has money,
    wishes to get divorced.
    .
    When without money,
    wife becomes secretary;
    When has money,
    secretary becomes wife.
    .
    When without money, acts like a rich man;
    When has money acts like a poor man.
    Man O Man! Never can tell the simple truth!
    .
    Says share market is bad,
    but keeps speculating;
    Says money is evil,
    but keeps accumulating.
    .
    Says high Positions are lonely,
    but keeps wanting them.
    .
    Says gambling & drinking is bad,
    but keeps indulging;

    Man O Man! Never means what he says and never says what he means..!! 


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